Knock Knock Yes?

You Know Wats Funny? Jokes....

What do you call a snake with no arms? Normal. What do you call an amphibian with no arms? A caecilian. What do you call a girl with no arms? A poor, poor soul that is unfortunate enough to have had an amputation when young. Now, she can't go in public without being stared at. She can't catch herself when she trips. She can't ride a bike, bake cookies for her family, or be a NASA astronaut like she always dreamed. She is the normal ASDF Movie character.

Get in the Batmobile.

An American man stopped me the other day and asked for the time, I looked at my watch and said: 5 o'clock.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, your wife and kids die.

Roses are red violets are blue I have AIDS go get checked

Tic tac toe. You were adopted.

How do you make a plumber sad? Kill his family.

Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? You have HIV.

Bumper Sticker: I Brake for Stop Signs

What happened to the guy who got bullied? He commited suicide.

What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree it can hurt you? A pool table.

No, we got to speak now, or you know, never.

I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one animal there and it was a dog. It was a shitzoo

Roses are red, Violets are red, Daises are red, holy crap my garden is on fire.

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put my penis in your mouth

Why was the blonde sent to prison? Well there could be a number of reasons, but I for one do not know this specific blonde so I can not help you.

What's worse than AIDS? Buying the anti-joke book

Whats worse than a paper cut? Nine/Eleven

Q: What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A: The dead baby was once alive, while the ferrari couldn't possibly have lived since it's a car and cars are inanimate objects.

What do you do with dead chemists? You carefully place their remnants in a casket, which is to be placed in a precisely dug hole. Once the casket is placed, you put a gravestone into the ground, signifying the chemists' date of birth and death.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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