- Anti Joke

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

Q: How did Whitney Houston die? A: Who?

What do you call red eyes in the dark? A high black man

Breast cancer.

Why was the toddler laying in the middle of the road? Because she was the victim of a hit and run...

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

Why did the Chicken cross the road? 9/11

two parrots are seated on a perch. One turns to the other and says, "Do you smell fish?"

Roses are red. I have OCD. That rose IS red right.. Let me check again.

Whats black and smells like white paint? A) Black paint!

Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

Why is Osama bimladin dead? Because he was a threat to American for many years, and someone finally found him and killed him.

why was 6 afraid of 7? He's not.

Why was the little girl crying? Her father has been abusing her and her mother for a year now.

Where did Sally go during the explosion? Everywhere.

Why don't Polish women use vibrators? They are extremely conservative Catholics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Justin Bieber got laid

Why did the British person go to the dentist? He had a poor diet which led to him getting cavities

melon

WHY DID THE CHICKEN FART SO LOAD TO GET EVRYYBODY ATENTION

What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

How did jimmy get hurt?? someone throw a fridge at him..

An Irish man walks out of a bra.

What do you call a joke without a punchline?