A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

You know what big feet mean? Big socks

Because you killed my Llama. He was my best-friend.

What is the Pope's favourite dish to order from the local Indian take-away? Korma.

What did the Mexican say when a house fell on him? Nothing. He's dead.

How do you get a clown of a swing? Hit it with an ax.

daniel thinks 30 rock is funny

What did one muffin say to the other in the oven? Nothing. They're muffins.

Roses are red, violets are blue a face like yours belongs in a zoo. Don't you worry I'll be there too, not in the cage but laughing at you.

Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

Boss: Do you know what lazy means? Employer: Yes, adopting a child.

why did the holocaust not die because black people are scared of fuck

A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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How come Kristin cant go play soccer anymore? She broke her leg kicking her brother in the face.

Jacob went onto anti-jokes cause Brock told him to and Jacobs his bitch.

Why do those Indian people have that dot on their forehead ? Idk but it makes a good target.

This is a swimmer Joke. Chuck Norris once lapped a kid in the 50 free... LONG COURSE.

Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

penus

Jews... The only funny thing they did was piss off Adolf Hitler

What do you get when you cross something with another thing that one would normally not cross with the aforementioned noun? A better love story than Twilight.

What's worse than finding a fly in your drink? Gonorrhea.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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