What's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

There was an Irishman, an American and a French man standing at a bar. They all ordered drinks and struck up conversation with each other about what they do for a living and their families. They all go home to their partners and have a peaceful nights sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's black, blue and smells like fish? A dead penguin.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What kind of a prediction is THAT?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

jay hefti is so cool and alex askew is hot

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What happened to the village that got swept by a tsunami? It was destroyed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? There are many, no human being is exactly alike.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you do when you have 2 eggs, but only want to use 1? I don't know. I guess you could just use 1 of them and save the other for another time?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Black construction worker say to the Asian salesman? I want some milk.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

If push pops give life a push, Then isn't your mailbox purple?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the cricket say to the bear when it entered it's den? Nothing,crickets comunicate by rubbing their back legs together to create vibrations and sound,and it cannot be understood by any other animal besides crickets.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

it depressed me to be diagnosed with depression

thumb_up thumb_down +8

your momma is so fat that she thinks someone hugs her each time she passes through a door

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Turn around.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

if life gives you lemons, throw them at pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: What did Robin Williams say to the young boy? A: Nothing, He is dead

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do Eskimos build igloos? Because it is the most practical form of habitation for their climate zone, lifestyle, and availability of materials.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

milly, milly, milly, cat

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive a car? Because she was deaf and blind and would have been a hazard to herself and others.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A man walk into a bar. He then falls down, quickly picks himself up, and continues his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops