Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to a chicken

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What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

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What do you call a joke with no punchline?

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An unarmed man robbed a bank today, he failed because he had no way of carrying the cash out.

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If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

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"Hey guys lets have a standing obviation." No one else stands....

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Friend: "Hey man! Did you hear about the kid who bought the last hamster at the pet shop? Other friend: "No..." Friend: "Oh, well he shot himself last night."

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What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

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guess what? chicken butt.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting ran over by a truck.

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A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

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what did the parapelegic (limbless) kid get for his birthday? Heart failure

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A black man, a jew, and an atheist are on a boat. Suddenly the boat started sinking. A mermaid would only save two of them. who do did she save? Mermaids don't exist. The all died. They were my friends.

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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What kind of coins to you find at the bottom of the ocean? Wet coins.

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I thought I was ugly But then I met you

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Waseem is not a funny guy!

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Q) what do girls like long , soft (can go hard) and has white stuff come out A) Twinkies but if left out of its plastic wrapping for a long period of time it will go hard

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What did the sting ray say to steve irwin? It doesn't matter , steve irwin is dead, dead as a doormat.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jonny Jonny who? Jonny tsunami, hope you can swim Japan

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What's worse than a 15 year old getting hit by a car? Adam Johnson

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Why didnt Santa give the little Girl her Pony? Santas not real.

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Whats the Twin Towers least favourite movie? Here Comes the Boom.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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