If an illegal immigrant fought a child molester, is it Alien vs. Predator?

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the dog that was chasing it.

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what does it mean when Justin Bieber sounds like a boy someones hit puberty

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Q: What's green, fuzzy, and if it falls out of a tree it will kill you? A: A pool table

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, And I'm color blind, So I don't give a shit

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family!!!!!!!!!!!!!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡¡!!!!!!¡¡¡¡

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Wanna hear a joke? Obamacare.

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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What's the difference between erotica and kink? Erotica involves simple arousal; kink usually has an added element of masochism.

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What will you never see? A white guy that camp jump.

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Why did the man burn all the children? He was a psychopath.

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Boy: Dad, come here I need to tell you something. Dad: What? Boy: My name is Jeff. Dad: *Grabs shotgun* " I've had with that damn term"

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Q. how did the blond get a college degree in medicine? A. she studied hard and aced her final exam.

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What did the bully call the box? a square, needless to say the box was offended

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Yo mamma's so stupid she sits on the TV and watches the couch. :) By Drew Bolton

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Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Multiple Personalities So do I Me to Don't forget about me!

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why were Tamika and Tyron afraid to get into the water? They weren't

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Why was the accountant sad? He just watched his wife have consensual sex with another man.

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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"Penis, penis, penis..." says Chase. That is all he likes and he fondles horse testes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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