What's the most racist thing ever... Manhattan

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1+1 =? Too

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How do you stop a baby from falling into a manhole? You catch it, and then call the appropriate services and inform them of the dangerous open manhole.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? He didnt.

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A guy walks into a bar. He was an alcoholic and it was destroying his family.

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A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys could get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you."

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You so dumb that you weighed 100 pounds and ate a peanut and weighed 500 pounds!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

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How do you know that someone is polish ? They smell funny

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-Knock, Knock -Who's there? -Carl -Carl wh-wait... carl...CARL OH MY GOD!!!! WE ALL THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD ,CARL!!!! Where have you been? Oh my god... Mom's DEAD! When we all thought you were dead she hung herself! IT'S YOUR FAULT SHE'S DEAD, CARL! YOUR FAULT!!!!!! YOU ARE AN UNGRATEFUL PIECE OF SHIT CARL! YOU KNOW THAT? I hope you burn in hell.

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Bird jokes are not funny! Crow up!

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Ask me if I am a bus. Are you a bus? No.

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What's brown and sticky? The faeces of a glue stick.

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Roses are red Violets are blue The sun is bright.

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This schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson. She scored poorly from her lack of practice and experience and was turned off from the sport.

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Your mother is so fat that she is highly likely to get heart disease and/or diabetes.

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How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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How do you call a black man selling fruits ? Yes, but I'm not sure

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What do you call a flying jew? Smoke.

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I'm a brony. I'm a brony. I'm a brony. Screw this shit, I'm not a brony anymore. I'm a man. I'm a man. Screw this too. I'm dead, not in bed.

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What's the difference between a model and a baby? I didn't have sex with a model last night.

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I lost my tractor.

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Two english guys meet at work

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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