A woman is walking down the street. A midget approaches her and with his keen sense of smell, informs the tall woman of her delicious scent and says, "Ma'am your hair smells lovely, may I please take a closer sniff?" Then woman obliges and the midget is arrested for alleged rape, or as he put it, trying to sniff her vagina.

Q: What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? A: Names

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

A: How much do you love me? B: Count the stars in the sky and you'll know. A: But, it's morning. B: Exactly.

Why did the penguin die? due to an increase in the quantity of greenhouse gases that are being released into the atmosphere, global warming is on the rise. So the penguin died because his home melted.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

The Game.

Four blondes are driving to Disney World. When they are in Florida, there is a sign that says "Disney left" Upset, they make a u-turn and go home.

you thought i was going to write a joke.. bitch

what's red, blue, and white all over? The American Flag

What did the cat say when you rub it's stomach? Nothing because felines don't have the needed vocal organs to speak, and probaly wouldn't know english do to the size of there brain.

Waht do chinease people and gambling machines have in common? They both say chink chink chink chink chink chinck

What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

I am a n1gger.

Knock knock. who's there? Alex. GO AWAY!!!

Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's being held hostage against her will.

Knock knock Who's there? It's me, Dave. You still wanna go to the movies? Oh, yeah...let me grab my wallet.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

Why did the plane crash? Why? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Q: What do you call a black man in space? A: An astronaut. -Ap

Gianni

what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

Two mooses were sitting in a tree, minding their own business, when suddenly a submarine came flying. "He probably lives here." The first moose said to the other.

Q: What did Cyclops say to Wolverine? A: "We're both X-Men!"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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