Whats the difference between a dead cat and a woman. The cat had a life.

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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What goes up a smokestack instead of down? Murdered Jews, when they get cremated.

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What did the father say to his daughter? "I'm going to rape you."

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yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Cheese that isn't yours

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Why did the man laugh when he saw someone using a shake weight? He remembered Dane Cook's stand up preformance from the night before.

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Why was the accountant sad? He just watched his wife have consensual sex with another man.

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A black teenager drives an Escalade His father is a prominent lawyer and his mother is a neuroscientist.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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Why does jim never go to McDonalds? his wife got shot there.

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What did the whale say when he ran into a wall? - Oh Shit

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What's the difference between a cow and a purple sweater? They're both purple Besides the cow

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what do u call a long dik gay guy Gay Dickerson

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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Why are old people such terrible drivers? As we age, our eyesight slowly deteriorates and our reflexes become slower. So, in order to be cautious, the elderly avoid high speed chases and such to maintain their and others safety. Or they could have alzheimers and not realize they are in a moving vehicle at all, it's really a tossup

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Two boys were walking down a building which was under construction. Suddenly a brick hits the 1 one in the head while the 2 guys aunt was in America.

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Womens Rights.

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Jesus Christ walks into a bar and the bartender says "Holy crap it's Jesus!" and everyone quickly updates their Facebooks.

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what did the short man say to the shoe? i sincerely hope that someone wouldn't try to carry a conversation with an inannnimate object, or else he is socially disturbed

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your so ugly, im going to kill you! Just kidding.......... Violets are purple. -Harrison

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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