I'm so hungry I could eat food

what's worse than getting an unwarranted parking ticket? Serving a life sentence for killing the meter man.

Ya know how when geese fly in a V-shape, one side is longer than the other? -Yes Do you know why that is? -No Because there's more geese on that side

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, this joke sucks.

What do you get if you cross a Black Man with a Knife? Stabbed.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Two girls are sitting quietly.

What did the homeless child get for Christmas? Leukemia

how do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? throw a mars bar off a cliff!

What makes Stephen Hawking such a lame scientist??? A: he has a disabling disease. It's called ALS.

Why did the man cross the road? Because that it where his friend Bob lives.

Why did the boy eat his bagel? He was hungry.

What is green with wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? A stimulus in the environment to the receptors in his fingers caused his hand to open no longer gripping the ice cream. Due to this, the ice cream fell to the ground causing a desirable mess for someone to clean up, satisfying themselves with the fact that they have considered the environment during this small ''could happen to anybody'' situation. After the messed was cleaned up, the boy's mother bought him another ice cream, in which case the boy anticipated another potential mess, and held the ice cream carefully. As he did this, he managed to finish eating the whole of the ice cream, allowing no money that was paid for the product to go to waste.

Why did the doctor have no peins? She was a woman.

Paperclip... BANANA?!

Jews.

What is the difference between a pizza and the Jews? The pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

a man died

why did the little girl fall off the swing - she had no arms.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he can't fly

Yo momma is SO black.

A tiger walks into a bar. Clearly there is something wrong with animal control.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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