Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

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How do you drown a blonde? Tie a cinderblock to her foot and throw her in water.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This doesnt rhyme, Microwave.

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So I went to my grandmothers house at 7 and left at 8.

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Why couldn't the unicorn fly? It was a horse.

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A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? The two ships suffered major damageand sank, killing over 100 people. The families of the passengers mourned their loss.

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A black man in a country bar.

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What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Time is irrelevant in this scenario because if this question is based in the United States it is highly unlikely an elephant will be near a fence you own, let alone sit on it, an activity rarely done by elephants and usually projected by humans onto other animals.

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

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What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

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Sophie Cameron is Gay

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you know whats funny the letter Q

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The bartender is institutionalized for paranoid schizophrenia.

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What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

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Chuck Norris doesn't do pushups, his personal trainer designed a regiment for him that didn't involve them.

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Whats the quickest way to a woman's heart? A bilateral incision on the upper left region of the sternum.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because I threw a fridge at her.

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why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

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BenWuzHear

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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What do you call a girl who got raped by ger dad? Casey Anthont

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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