Q: What do you call a hobo asking for change? A: Get off my driveway!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What’s black and white and red all over? A zebra in a meat grinder

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Did you hear about the dyslexic eye chart maker? His disability caused to him to have a difficult time at work and his production suffered because of this.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats worse then losing your phone? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream in the oven. Ha ha ha ha

thumb_up thumb_down +22

You know what they say about big feet... Wow, those are some big feet.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: What is the differenc between a Jew and a boy scout? A: The boy scout comes back from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Once upon a time, I farted They believe this now as the "Big Bang"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the man say to the other man? You smell nice today.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Your Mom.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How many black ppm does it take to screw in a light bulb All of them, plus 1 white guy.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

why did the girl like d1ck? because d1ck was a nice boy

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the plane crash and everybody die on board? The plane crashed because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

its my money!, but i dont need it right away

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's the difference between Cindy Crawford and a Snickers bar? Nothing. One is a mediocre actress, the other is a peanut based bar of chocolate confectionary.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What's red and smells like green paint? The rotting corpse of the old lady I poisoned with green paint.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops