As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!".

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If you like this song so much why don't you marry it? Because a divorce would be tough on the kids

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I'm rubber and you're glue, whatever you say bounces of me and bounces of you too because sound isn't affected by your adhesive properties.

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Who graduated top of their class, got their degree two years early and lead a very successful life? Not you

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

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What did the boy have for lunch? A sandwich.

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What's blue and pillowy? A blue pillow

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dead battery come on down

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What's more funny than a dead baby? A dead baby dressed like a clown.

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What's the difference between a girl's mouth and her vagina? There is none. I want my penis to be inside both of those things.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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What did the dog say to the cat before they fought? Lets fight

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Why was the black man put in jail? Because he escaped.

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A priest and a rabbi are walking down the street when they see an orphanage on fire. "Oh my god!" says the rabbi. "We have to save the children!" "Screw the children!" says the priest. "Out of what?" replies the rabbi.

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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What's worse than cancer? Death.

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A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

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Knock, Knock! Cum inside ;;)

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What is sad about a kid dying in a bus accident? The other 20 survived

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who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

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a gay guy walks into a bar what does he do? buys a drink after a hard day at work

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What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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Bin Laden: dang, these pizza guys are so late, this pizza better be free! door: Ring ring ring.. Bin Laden: yes its finally here!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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