A child rides by his mother on his bicycle and says "Look Mom, no hands!" The child doesn't come back, and night falls but he has yet to come home. His mother calls the police and a search begins 2 days later. He is never found is presumed dead.

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What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless you're paralyzed.

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Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

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How did the blind man eat his soup? With a spoon. Despite no vision, the man could feel the shape of what he was touching.

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Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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What did the fat girl say to her friend? I'm fat.

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Why did the potato commit suicide? Forget that. Why was the potato alive in the first place?

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? 17

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Don't you hate it when your reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles.

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I see London, I see France, I am in an airplane on my way to Europe.

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Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Quack Pi pi pi pi Pi pi pi pi Pingu Pingu!

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What do you get when you mix Catholicism and Islam? War

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How do you feed a mockingbird? Give it some food.

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Your Mom.

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What do you call to guys who gave gave each other HIV? Blood-Brothers

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what do u call a apple a apple

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Chinese, Japanese, dirty knees - have nothing at all in common.

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Knock-knock who's there? interrupting cow interupting cow who? moo.

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What happened to the peanut who went to NYC? Nothing because he was eaten on the plane

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What do you call a mexican working at Taco Bell? An intelligent young man who recently graduated from high school, but due to his family's lack of money, he cannot pay for college, which is one of the reason's why he is working. He also needs money becuase he has a child on the way, due to his poor choice of not using protection while having intoxicated relations with his girlfriend. I wish him the best of luck!

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Why did the child step on a ball?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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