When is a tree not a tree? When it's a rock.

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Why was the black guy charged for murder? He killed his wife.

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What do you call a dog with no arms or legs? Doormat.

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What's the difference between a table lamb? A fishing pole, automobiles are very useful

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Chuck Norris once punched a horse in the chin. Nearby people were disgusted at this act and immediately reported him for animal abuse. Today he is in prison

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what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

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Knock Knock Who's There?? Its the police your family have died in a tragic road accident

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im gonna sue mcdonalds i asked for a hamburger and it was a beef burger -_-

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

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What's worse than having the name Riley Bathurst? being shot in the head by a black guy.

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How did the boy die? Because he got molested and raped by a pedophile!

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see ya

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boy? Nothing. He's been dead for over three years.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? WHO CARES!!

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Sarah Palin, George Bush Jr and Glenn Beck are having a massive orgy with an illegal mexican immigrant, a member of the NAACP and an empathetic selfless homosexual democrat...no condoms were used because only felatio and cunilingus was being performed...

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Q: Why doesn't Micheal Jackson have orgasms? A: Because he's dead.

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A black guy, a white guy and a Pakistani are walking together when they see a lamp, They rub the lamp and out pops a Genie who, with only three wishes to grant, lets them have one wish each. The Pakistani wishes that all people of Pakistani origin are returned to their country with health and wealth. The black guy thinks this is a good idea and asks for the same for all Africans and Caribbean's. The white guy says "are there really no more Pakistani's or blacks in the country?" The Genie confirms this is accurate. The white guy is devastated, who will drive the buses, operate the power stations, produce the medicines and work in the hospitals that these people did? I wish for them to be returned.

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what's green and has wheels? grass, i lied about the wheels.

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

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*prepares this to get negged*

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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Women's Rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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