A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why do penguins wash their clothes in tide? They don't. As artic-dwelling birds, they don't have access TV or magazines and as such, are impervious to influences via commercials and written advertisements. Also, obvious tuxedo jokes aside, they don't really wear clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Gay's rights

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's a slang term for a really, really fat person? Overweight.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How does a blonde restart her computer? Seriously, you guys, I need help. I'm not a very technological person.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A bear and a rabbit sits by a small lake in the forest, taking a shit. After a while, the bear asks the rabbit: "Do you have problems with shit hanging from you fur after you're done?" The Rabbitm ponders, and responds: "No, bear. I really don't". Than the bear wiped his ass with some moss.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats yellow pink and blue and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? Oh were you expecting an answer here, if i knew the answer i wouldn't have asked a question.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Alice fail Maths? Because everybody else was Asian.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

have you tasted chocolate flavoured slurpee? no. i haven't either

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mamma so mexican she brought tacos to the dinner table

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Im going to france... Why To get french fries! Have fun Im back with a $10000bill to pay Wheres the fries Shit

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black, white, and red all over? The color scheme. Except for the black and white. They're shades.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

^that joke a piece of shit

thumb_up thumb_down -5

a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: What's small and can't read? A: A candybar

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the man with cancer do? Die

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the car.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops