A visibly exhausted and distressed man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink. "Long day?" the bartender asks. Since the man understands the meanings of most common phrases he responds in the correct and expected manner.

A blind man walks into a bar. Then a chair. Then a table. (TD)

Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

What happened when a Blonde girl and a Ginger man have sex without a condom? The woman gets pregnant and then after about nine months the woman gives birth and the child grows up, when the child is adolescent it is able to reproduce and the process continues again.

What lives in a pineapple under the sea? Japanese People

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

Knock Knock. Who's there? A Pokemon pencil!!! A Pokemon pencil who? I just found a Pokemon pencil next to my computer when I was playing pokemon!!! LMFAO!

BOOBALANBOO

John - hey do you have tickets to see Oasis? Sam - No I bought green day tickets intead. John rolls his eyes at sam very dissapointedly then proceeds to go home. The next day Sam phones John excitedly telling him he traded his Green day tickets for Oasis tickets, a smile appears on Johns and Sams faces, not that they can see each other, they both then put the phone down. An African died. Green Day are a bad band.

Q:What did the Black man say to New York? A: Black Out.

What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

det va en tjej som va inne på ica och handlade, framme vid kassan la hon fram en banan, en billys pizza, ett litet paket bröd och en mjölk. -är du singel eller? frågar killen i kassan -ja hur visste du det, svarar hon -du e skitful ju

Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

what do you call a blonde that spends fifteen thousand dollars at a bar? an alchoholic.

A black man and a mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black man.

Whats the difference between a black person and dirt? nothing

People say it's easy to make fun of retarded people. But it's really not. You always have to explain it to them.

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because the grass is always greener on the other side.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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