Knock knock. Who's there? Your neighbour. My neighbour who? Timothy, welcome to the neighbourhood!

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watermelons are red, pineapples are yellow. i'm not a poet, say hello for me.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? The same number it would take people with any other hair color.

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3 Mormon men walk by a blonde woman eating a banana. They are not distracted by this and continue their journey of spreading Christianity.

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What is the result of a couples' feud? 96.

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19th amendment

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A tree walks into a bar and the bartender asks "why the log face?".

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Guess What? What? The gludeus maximus of an avian farm bird

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What is worse than 20 babies stapled to trees? 1 baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Your mother is so fat........... that she is morbidly obese and is at severe risk for diabetes and other weight related diseases.

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12 sea cows waddle into a bar... Yea, I bet, you'd like to hear the end of that one.

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A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a truck.

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What is the difference between Boyscouts and Jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food before? No? Well neither have they.

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1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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Why did bobby fall of the swing? He had no arms -Knock knock -Who's there? -Bobby -But how? -I knocked with my diick -Oh

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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Some blind tall guy asked a rich dude about time when the rich dude looked at his klock he remembred many things in his ugly terrible life so he said to the blind guy : its 5PM

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Hitler: Ve shud vork togeza and place stategic bombs overr your island. Castro: You are dead.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A Kid With ADD A Kid With AD- Oh Look! A Squirrel!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops