Knock knock? Who's there? To. To who? To WHOM.

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Hey! do you have any updog? Nothing much! you?

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Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

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What do you call 99 lawyers in a car going off a cliff with no driver and another lawyer running in the other direction? A dick move.

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What did the coach do to the player Coached the player

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What happened when Aladdin rubbed his lamp? It got slightly cleaner.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating on the water? Dead.

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how do you get someone out of a chair? hit him with a shovel

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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What has 2 brown legs and 2 gray legs? An elephant with diarrhea.

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Snausages.

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Man walks into a gun store, buys a gun. The same man goes home and lives happily till he dies of cancer. His son takes the gun shots himself, survives then later dies of cancer.

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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knock knock who's there? a murderer. a murderer who? a murderer who kills you and your family.

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Suddenly the Titanic started sinking, its a shame it sunk before anyone managed to find out what it was sinking about.

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Like if you like big tits.

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Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

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What's the difference between a freezer and a baby? A freezer doesn't scream when I pack my meat into it.

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How do you get a blonde to break a nail? Smash her finger with a wrench.

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Joanna walks up to a random house, knocks on the door,"Is this where the party's at?!"

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What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

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why did summer hit the child because the child is jackson

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whats orange, nocturnal, and hurts to the touch? The sun or an orange owl... Depends on your preference

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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