A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

An atheist walks into a church

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Roses are red violets are blue your mother is pretty what happened to you.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why are black guys good at basketball? Hard work and determination.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why are you reading this? You should be taking a shower, you smell like crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did one child say to the other child? We both are kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wat is brown and sticky? A stick

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Good luck on your finals everyone!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

The answer: He is dead! (read it throughout so you cant go wrong) Question: So why cant a man in Italia marry his widows sister? Moral: Had yet to read one like this one...

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Dont you guys just hate it when someone puts a stupid joke on anti-joke?

thumb_up thumb_down +26

The daring man said "here goes nothing." And nothing happened. -Tag

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Justin Bieber is a good singer.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is black, white and red all over? A black, white and red pen.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Milkman. Milkman who? I've been coming here for 14 years and you don't even know my name? I helped take your mother to the hospital for crying out loud! I held you in my arms as a baby! And you don't even have the decency to remember MY NAME?! I'm sorry I don't live in a house that allows milk and other groceries to be delivered, I'm sorry that I wasn't born into a nice family with a nice home! I'm sorry that I have had to come here EVERY WEEK FOR FOURTEEN YEARS and you can't even remember my NAME! My name! I left my family for christmas one year to go pick up that elmo doll for you when you were a kid! I saved you from that burning treehouse! I helped you with you're 3rd grade science fair project and you won! YOU WON! We took a picture together that i have kept in my wallet. And i proudly say here's me and timmy. ME AND TIMMY! TIMMY! But no...you don't need to know my name. Well good day sir. You shan't see me again.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What is black and white and red all over? Two Nuns in a chainsaw fight.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops