How do you get 2000 people to go to heaven? Blow up a school.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation. John was never the same.

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What is black and white and red all over? Yemen's national flag.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. One says "I'll have H20", the other says "I'll have a beer." The first one is the one to drive them to their homes.

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Why was the man thought to be peculiar? Because he had sex with a pistachio.

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Why did the man fall off the cliff? I pushed him????????

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I never asked for this.

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That Awkward moment when your whole family dies

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An Irishman, a homosexual and a Jew walk into a bar. Paddy's really exploring his options lately.

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What do call a limbless man swimming? Dead.

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What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out it's an orange

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Barack Obama, George W. Bush and Dick Cheney are in a room, what are they doing? A: Breathing

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What the difference between a alien and you nothing

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pickle juice?

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. He values his privacy and will not tell me his motives.

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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What is the hardest part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... No they are not they come in many different colors from cross breeding and different environments.... YOU ARE WRONG

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A black man went to jail while a white man received $200 dollars. They were playing a friendly game of monopoly.

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Yes.

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They say the human body is comprised of 70% water, it's more like... 60% because I'm dehydrated if know what I'm saying... I should really drink some water.

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Whats worse than getting dirt on your brand new J's Finding your girlfriend cheating on you with your Great Dane and realizing that he dose her better than you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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