Knock Knock!! Who's There? No one, your being ding dong ditched!

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Nohypocondrism: When you feel fine and everyone keeps telling you you are a sick bastard. Charisma: Hey, that guy that changed my life killed the neighbor, cool rite? I mean that damn neighbor did say nothing to me when I said hi. Solitude: When the room is so overcrowded that you feel small and alone. I think that people that are jack of all trades and master of none are stupid... I AM JACK OF NO TRADES AND MASTER OF ALL! I am nothing, because nothing lives on forever, nothing is unbreakable, nothing is really awesome on a terrible day... I am also Nobody, because Nobody has more money than me.. FUUUUUUUU..

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a dyslexic Satan worshiper sold his soul to Santa

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How are friends like bananas? If you peel off their skin and eat them, they die.

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Why don't women know how to drive a car? Because there are no roads between the kitchen and the bedroom.

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How do you get a one-armed blonde out of a tree? Get a ladder and help her down.

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What do Elephants and Grapes have in common? They are both purple, except the Elephant.

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Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

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What did the compliemantry peanuts say to the man? "Nice tie."

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version 2 knock knock, whose there FU CK FU CK who FU CK YOU

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There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

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Whats funny about black people getting shot by whites We can steal our bikes back now

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A Guy walks into a Bar, has a good time and leaves

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. -sensored-

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If Africa had more mosquito nets, millions, MILLIONS of mosquitoes would die for hunger.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Selena Gomez

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What happened when the young boy farted. It smelled. :)

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar with a vase of 12 roses. 57 years later he died after a lengthy battle with colon cancer.

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Guess What! HI!

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She's dead.

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Why did Janelle fail her math test? Because she didn't study.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

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Q : Who is the most famous celebrity, Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber? A : Neither, because they are just fads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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