Me: Ask me if im a penguin friend: are you a penguin? me: no.

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What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

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You know you have no friends when you write anti-jokes. [M]

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What did the young girl say to her step-dad? Nothing. She no longer talks to him after years and years of sexual abuse which left her emotionally scarred.

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Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

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What is black, white, and red all over? A person who has black, white, and red paint on his or her body.

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knock knock come in

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Wow, so it is true, you are here the entire fucking time aren't you bitch? You and all "six billion of your followers of the dark", listen asshead, one thing is people asking ME when I FUCKING SIGN BOOKS (which does not happen all that FUCKING OFTEN!) Why I lead a fucking cult of sorts. Another one is having your goons stab me in the FUCKING EYE, and going "Oh I am like so sorry, please let me be the gayest I can be" People assaulting me because I use the "Moralman identity" IT IS MINE! My real FUCKING NAME IS NERO! I DON'T GO AROUND STEALING NOBODY`S SHIT!

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What did the Beatrice do after she got kicked off of X Factor? she went to a nearby store and bought a slim jim

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A boy found a nickel on the street. So he went to the ice cream shop and bought a gumball with the nickel.

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Q. What did the fat guy get for his birthday? A. diabetes

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What happened to the starving african kid? He died

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a dog walks into a drug store and orders a bone. what does the cashier do? she wakes up.

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Whats the worst thing about seeing a truck being snapped in half? It was mine

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a rapist.

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Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

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Why did the clown fall off the swing? Because he was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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