why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

whats a dick a dick

1: Knock. Knock. 2: Don't come in I'm naked.

The cow went moo

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A; On the other side was another beautiful looking chicken who he plans to marry and raise a family with.

yolo mother f-uckaaaa

Whats the difference between a pontiac and a pile of dead babies? I dont have a pontiac in my garage.

Hey I had a wet and dirty dream about you last night. Really? What happened? You got hit by a bus and I pissed myself laughing. .......

What's black and white and red all over? Two nuns in a chainsaw fight.

What's funnier than a dead triceratops? Nothing, nothing at all...in fact this is scary because the triceratops and their other Cretaceous herbivores, have been extinct for over 3.5 trillion years... ........also if you see a dead triceratops, you're probably tripping on LSD.........

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who`s there? Not Suzie

a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

Your mother is so rotund, in fact she went to a weight loss clinic... but gained weight

So three men walk into a bar. One orders a Miller Light, the other orders a Guiness, and the third has a glass of ice water. He was the designated driver.

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

Why is Steven so gay? Because hes actually Richard Simmons

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender stands speechless due to the ridiculousness of the situation -Tag

Why did the donkey fall over Because it had A diabetic foot infection and had to have a non traumatic amputation of the lower hind leg.

What killed the cat? Feline Leukemia

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

i have a white dog on my and have the strangest boner

What did the catholic priest say to the naked boy where are your clothes?

Why is the apple mushy? Because a car ran over it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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