What is faster than a black guy stealing a TV? His brother with a DVR

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chiken cross the road? Well its wing were clipped so it couldnt fly across the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

thumb_up thumb_down -3

69

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A man walks into a hospital with a panicked expression, and rushes to his doctor's office. "Doctor, I am in tremendous pain when I breath!" "Hmm, seems to be a lung problem, take one of these antibiotics twice a day." "Thank you so much!" "Oh yah! Your family was brutally killed in a sixteen car pile up."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally. What did Sally get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road, and then come back halfway? A: He was racing his friend to the other side. He didn't realize his friend got hit by a truck until he looked back. He continually cried until finally he got it together and walked over to his dead friend. He wasn't paying attention though, and another truck hit him. The truck driver continued his road trip and bought KFC for dinner.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why are females bad drivers? Because it is hard to drive with pots and pans.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you kill a mocking bird? You throw an axe at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

why is the name Brian so funny BECAUSE IT IS!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm extremely unstable. And So are you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the woman say when the man got her flowers? "Why thank you."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Wanna hear a joke? Joe Jonas.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where's Waldo? Nowhere. Waldo is a fictional character. He doesn't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

who's best is friend is really good looking? James Cornish

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you make a wall a darker shade of red? You throw the baby harder.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

There was a man on a park bench and he saw a duck fly by so he decided to go and see what it was up to. He saw that it was just going for a swim in a near by pond. He died 2 years ago of auto erotic asphyxiation because of a common fetish.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A black and a mexican jump off a building, What a tragedy...

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Men, get on the boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is the best place to get watermelons and fried chicken? A Watermelon grove and a popeyes and/or KFC

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the chicken say when it crossed the road? Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops