How did the family of Cubans get to Florida? They flew first class from their home in upstate New York.

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

What did one ocean say to the other ocean, nothing it just waved

What is worse than a bunch of babies stapled to a tree? A bunch of trees stapled to a baby.

Why did the cancer patient shave his head? He wanted to pretend he still had hair.

Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

What did the lemon say to the turtle? If you think the lemon said anything, something is wrong with you.

Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

What does WTF stand for? Welcome to Facebook!

Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

What do you call two black guys having sex with Paris Hilton? N*ggas in Paris

Why did the clown fall off the swing? He got shot.

What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

Sonic

what is the difference between joe diragi and jerry sandusky sabdusky only targets human little boys

If u wanna get high, smoke weed

What do you call a man with no heart? Dead.

What does a rock become when it falls into the red sea? Wet.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had died.

What bad thing could happen if you gave a black man a gun? ....stop expecting some racist punchline!

What is long and black? Some umbrellas.

Why was the blonde crying? She had just been raped by a 10-foot praying mantis.

how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

So what makes you that much adaptable? I get the feeling I should get this by now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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