What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: Why was 2 afraid of 3? A: Cause 3 4 5!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

How many babies does it take to change a light bulb? No amount of them could ever figure it out. They all tremble with fear in the dark.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

who do hannah morgan and bonnie do in their free time? ANTI JOKEZ

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What did the virulent Homophobe do during the PRIDE national day of silence? He talked

thumb_up thumb_down +10

what happens when you have A.D.D.? you're EXTREMELY annoying

thumb_up thumb_down +10

More mindfuck "government hypnosis edition": What can doctors possibly do in order for you to wait enough for them to come to help you? They call you "their PATIENT!" Moral: So be patient and wait, oh thee brainwashed.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

the comment about daniel was fron brock

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call one lawyer shot dead in the street? Ghandi.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

whats an orphans favorite memory? Not one with his/her parents! PWNED TO ALL YOU ORPHANS OUT THURRRRR!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

thumb_up thumb_down +10

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Follow the Yellow brick road, follow the yellow brick road........except it's not yellow.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a retarded sheep? Whatever it's name is. There's no sense in torturing it by pointing out the disability which has made it a social outcast it's whole life.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock Who's there? A human pretending to be a dog A human pretending to be a dog who? Errr...I mean...woof

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Simple poke her face.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

knock, knock. come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Yo mamas so stupid that she received slightly below average in her latest maths test

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than cancer? Death.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is brown and sticky? Black tar heroin.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops