So there are 5 people on a plane the president, a movie star, and man who is on the verge of making world peace, the smartest man in the world, and the pope the piolt has a heart atack at and the plane will crash soon there are only 4 parachutes. So the first is Obama and he saysI won a Nobel piece prize and I run American see ya later and he takes the parachute next Steven hawking says sory pope Im taking this because I don't believe in God and black holes are cool so he takes the parachute and jumps out. Next Charlie Sheen says I need to entertain people and keep the drug dealers in business so he. Takes the parachute and jumps out. Then Francis turns to the hippie and says if you achive world peace it may help eliminate some poverty so you take the last paratute and jump out then the hippie says in return no its OK Steven Hawking took my back back. When they land they decide to serch for Steven's body and they find nothing. You see Steven Hawking had taken his own paratute with him and took the Hippies backpack to sell it and make some money

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What did America get on the 11th September? 9/11

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Why didn't the little boy believe in Santa Clause? Because' he saw his parents putting presents under the tree, and saw his over weight father eat all the cookies.

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Why did my brother drive the speed limit? Because it's the law

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Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

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69

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Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

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Q: What's the deal with air line food? A: An airline meal or in-flight meal is a meal served to passengers on board a commercial airliner. These meals are prepared by airline catering services. The first kitchens preparing meals in-flight were established by United Airlines in 1936. These meals vary widely in quality and quantity across different airline companies and classes of travel. They range from a simple beverage in short-haul economy class to a seven-course gourmet meal in long-haul first class.

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Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

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there are two kinds of people in this world: those who like anit jokes and those who don't

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HEY YOU!!! just checking for assholes

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I walked into a bar the other day and ordered a double. The bartender brought out a guy who looked just like me.

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Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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[Insert Stereotypical Joke, And Insert Logical Answer Here] Anti - Anti-Joke

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So a man enters a local paper's pun contest. He enters ten puns in hopes that one of them would win. But unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

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What do you call a person with an arrow in their head? Dead

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A cup of ranch walks into a lemon

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Whats worse then finding TWO worms in your apple? The Holocaust, it was pretty bad.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Ze Gestapo!

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Mcfly: Doc! i have to tell you about the future! Doc: Ok.

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why did the pinapple walk the plank? to eat a cat because cheese say people!

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If you're reading this, you can read.

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How many penises is one metric butt-load. Oh God I hope you don't know the answer.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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