What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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whats worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies and their grieving mothers standing over them. thats what.

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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why did the kid get chemotherapy? because he had cancer

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what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

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Why are elephants gray? So you don't get them confused with blueberries.

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- Knock knock - Those knock jokes are getting old - Indeed. Scratch scratch - MY DOOR

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What do you get when you put a cat in a Xerox machine? A copycat.

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q

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Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

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What's sad about the Holocaust? well i don't know ,it may or may not have anything to do with you and cause absolutely no sad emotions toward the subject. I for one don't care.........

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what do a fish and wood have in common? when they're dead, they float

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house? that is child labor, which is illegal in many countries.

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what did the smoker say to the doctor? nothing she died of lung cancer.

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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A Woman decides she wants to stop making sanwiches for her sexist boyfriend. She walks away and lives a happy life. In hell.

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Two men are sitting in a pub. One man turns to the other and says: 'Last night I saw lots of strange men coming in and out of your wife's house.' The other man replies: 'Yes, she has become a prostitute to subsidize her drug habit.'

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Q) What is the difference between an elephant and a toaster? A) Do you seriously not know the difference between an elephant... and a toaster?

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What's 17 times worse than a 3? I don't know, personally I don't think 3's are so bad.

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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