why do elephants drink so much? to try to forget.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

A gorilla walks into a bar and orders a banana martini. The bartender thinks this is a little peculiar and then becomes aware he is actually dreaming. He wakes up from his dream and begins to tell his wife about the ridiculous dream he had. His wife just ignores him, the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes his marriage is in shambles.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

WHATS BALCK AND YELLOW AND UNDER WATER? A BUMBLE BEE IN A SUBMARINE.... YEAH YOU BETTER #$%^ING LAUGH YOU HOMO

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the child step on a ball?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Knock Knock Who's there? A mormon *slam*

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the black man order a bucket of Kentucky Fried Chicken? His wife just died in a tragic car accident and he is a horrible cook.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

how do you get to your favorite chinese restaurant? Wok.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the tree get mad at the bush? It didn't. Bushes are inanimate objects, and so are trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What is worse than spending time with in-laws? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why didn't the black man drink out of the white water fountain? Because he wasn't thirsty.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

a mushroom walks in to a little boys party the boy says why are u here mushroom says because im a fun-guy (fungis,fungi)

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Why was 6 afraid of seven? Seven brutally abused and raped 6 as a child.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A drunk is pissing on the plaza and the cop stands next to him and says, very nice. The drunk says, that's what she said. : )

thumb_up thumb_down +28

You are so average that, if you entered an average contest, you'd come in middle place.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Whats the difference between babies and basketballs? You cant unload a truck of basketballs with a pitchfork.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

knock knock whos there? the police, your under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Wal-mart didn't have the product I wanted. So I yelled at the manager until they had it. It didn't work and i was taken to jail.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops