Q. What does a rock and a bird have in common? A. Everything. Except a bird can fly and has wings and can breath and eats and makes babies...

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What do you call a person who uses food stamps? Poor. What do you call a black person who uses food stamps? Still poor.

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Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

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Why did suzy drop her popsicle? She was trampled by a homosexual moose.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

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Three Jews are hiding under the floorboards. One of them makes and noise and they are promptly found by the invading German soldiers. They are all shipped to Aushwitz where two of them are sent directly to the gas chambers where they are killed. The third Jew survives the Holocaust and is eventually liberated by Allied forces. He returns to his country only to find his house burnt to the ground. With no money or food, he starves to death by the side of the road and his body is eaten by various animals.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

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A man runs into a house and unloads a round of bullets killing 2 people in the kitchen. He wins Search and Destroy for his team at Nuketown.

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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So Jimmy's phsycology teacher is trying to think of beginnig lessons for her phsycology class. so she gets up and says "class, i want u anyone who thinks they are stupid to stand up." nobody stood up. then Jimmy stands up. The teacher says "Jimmy, u think u are stupid?" Jimmy replies "No, i just felt bad with u standing up all alone."

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roses are red , violets are blue , sugar is sweet and so are you. the roses are wilting the violets are dead. the sugar bowl is empty and so is your head

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Why did the kid fall off the swing? He had no arms.

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Q:What happened when the black guy walked into the bar? A:He bought a drink and quietly drank it until he was finished.

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Why was the bear rushing home after work? Because he was late for dinner.

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What did the prisoner say to the man who posted his bail? Thank you.

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Friends are like potatoes. If you eat them, they die.

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How do you push a blond off a cliff? Push here.

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Why did ned fall out of the tree? Because he was hit by a koala.

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Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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i jack off in the school bathroom #yolo -toby limbers

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I want to stick ma dick in a big bowl o puddin'

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What do you call a girl with one leg at your door step? Ilean

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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