whats worse then a baby with out floaties?.......beating your grandma to death with a puppy

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Why was the little boy late to church? He was getting raped by the priest. ....the priest was late too.

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5

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Yo Mama so slow She can't run very fast.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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How many Weasleys does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 2

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What did the white guy say to the black guy? I used to be black also. My name is Michael.

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bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

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what do you call a newborn baby? anything you want.

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Q:Why did the boy cry? A: because his mom was hit by a bus Q: why did the boy wipe his face? A:he was covered in his mother blood and threatened all the witness who saw him push his mother into the bus

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Q: What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the man not make any change at his job? Because he is Barack Obama.

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What do you get if you cross a bulldog with a schitzu? A half breed prone to allergies and breathing problems.

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A black guy walks into a dilapidated house and purchases large amounts of narcotics. Racism isn't funny.

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What is the difference between a mom and a dad? One is a mom and the other is a dad. Why couldn't Fred see the board? He had a frog stapled to his face.

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How do you get a dog to obey your rules?¿¿? Threaten to beat it with a rod!¡!

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Why was danielle so fat? She can't help her bad genetics

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What did the nazi say to the jew? im gay

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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In Soviet Russia, millions of innocents died due to the oppression.

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A bus full of orphans falls off a cliff.

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Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

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A duck walks into a bar.... Animal control is swiftly called and the duck is relocated to a nearby park.

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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