You smell like shit

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Whats better than 24? 25.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocost

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Why did the man not open his door to the trick or treaters? He was a sex offender and it was illegal for him to open it...

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? The Pilot. You racist bastard.

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Why did Billy fall of his bike HE HAD NO BIKE

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A man walks into a doctors and says 'Doctor, Doctor, I have a bad stomach ache' Upon hearing this, the doctor writes the man a prescription for medication and wishes him a swift recovery.

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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A man walks into a bar. His friend follows him in, but the first man doesn't know he's there. They both order a beer, then a couple strong shots. The first man then notices his friend, and they exchange high-fives. The man's friend says, "Hey, how ya doin?" The first man says, "Okay, I guess, but I forgot the punchline." So the second man orders his friend the strongest drink, and the weakest. He replies, "Me too, Joe. Meeeeee, too."

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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Friends are like bananas. If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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You know what they say about women with really big feet? They actually don't say anything.

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a person smokes weed... and gets high

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What's funny about a blond, a brunette, and a red-head, drunk in a Cadillac? Everyone knows integration is a myth.

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Why can't the man have babies? His nuts was cut off and he eventually bleed to death.

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A: B: No pun intended.

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Straight men can be bronies.

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If Jimmy has 60 candy bars and eats 50 of them, what does he have? Diabetes.

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Whats green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A golf course

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Why was the horse sad? Because it seen a Tesco van in the distance.

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A woman walks into the living room while her husband is watching tv. The husband tells her "Make me a Sandwich", so she goes to the kitchen and makes him a sandwich like shes told to.

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When life gives you lemon squeeze it in someone's face

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what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

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A duck walk into a bar and asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender hands him a glass and the duck drinks it. After finishing his drink he ruminates about how drowning his misery with booze won't solve a thing in his life. He decided he'll call his ex-wife and apologize and goes back home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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