A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

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how do u know when your in west virginia? when the houses have more wheels than the cars

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A: What did the banana say to the other banana? B: I don't know, what? A: I don't know either, I was hoping you did.

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what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

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How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

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Your mother is so stupid that she has an IQ score that is much lower than the average person.

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What's the difference between a duck, an engineer, and a leaf? There are many differences between these 3 that I will not list them all.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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A small boy called peter got stuck up a tree, a man walks past and said "how did you get up there?" peter replies "i fell"

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You know what big feet mean? Big socks

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch

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A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

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knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

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I like toast -my name is Bob and I approve of this message

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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There are four dead people on a boat. They commit suicide. Why did they commit suicide. To get to the other side!

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Whas the difference between a boy going to a camp and a jewish boy going to camp? The jewish boys does not come back.

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Q: What time do you see a Chinese dentist? A: Never because China has a flawed healthcare system due to overpopulation. It is a sad and sobering reality of the plight of the Chinese citizens.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was Friday night (or Halloween or St. Patty's Day) and the chicken was at a party. He got totally drunk, and then got the bright idea that it would be okay to drive home. On a rural two-lane highway, his vehicle careened into the oncoming traffic lane, and then the ditch, thus crossing the road. Fortunately, he walked away with only a few scratches. However, he was cited for wreckless driving, and got a DUI as well.

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Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? He had no arms… Why did he have no arms? Jimmy was a potato

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A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

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Knock Knock Who's there? A bag of burning crap.

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If yesterday was friday, today is saturday, what day is it tomorrow? sunday

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Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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