Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have narcolepsy.

What rhymes with 'stick' and is brown? A stick

Drunk irish man

Knock knock, Who's there? Jason. Jason wh-(death sound when being cut by chainsaw)

How come Emmet Till never attended college? Because he was brutally murdered.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A pig rolls in the mud.

Why did the pineapple cry? It didn't, because it's a pineapple.

A man tells his wife to leave the kitchen

Q. What happened when a mouse ran up the clock and it struck 12? A. It fell off and got raped by an 80 year old Asian lady with breast cancer

What is black at the bottom, and white at the top? Society.

why was the water bottle empty? because bob drank it. stupid bob...

Q: How many banana peels does it take to run down the street, true or false? A: Telephone poles don't have doors.

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

How did the priest die? Masterbation

Q: What's Black and White and Red All Over? A: This is a logical fallacy. If something is "Red All Over," it is implied that no other color can be showing. Thus, whatever innate Black and/or Whiteness was formerly attributed to said object will now have been inherently obfuscated by its Redness.

Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why did Jesus and his friends get crucified? So they could sing: "Always look at the bright side of life" Moral: Monty Python?

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

What do you do when a taco eater eats your food? Beat him with the nearest black man's dick.

BALLS! said the Queen if i had them i would be King

Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

What did the blind and deaf woman get for her birthday? Raped.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...