Why didn't the pro-choice, pregnant woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

How do you drown a down syndrome child? Put him/her into water.

Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

what do you call a black guy fixing your electricity an electrician

Knock Knock! Who's there? Banana. Go away.

A caterpillar walks into a bar. I don't know how he opened the door.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then he sits down to enjoy his evening.

How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

whats one word that gets everyones attention? rapist,bomb,and sex

Scenario- A wedding while skydiving. Problem- The groom lost his parachute. Question- Who stole it? Hint- The Maid of Honor didn't have one either, but he had one on his body when he hit the ground. Answer- The mailman, but he died of old age.

why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the monkey.

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

why was the black woman forced to sit in the back of the bus? all the other seats were taken.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because someone was chasing it with an axe.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

*insert joke here*

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

a sailor went to his G.P to see if he had HIV turned out he had hepititis C

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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