Knock knock Who's there? Doug I'm sorry Doug, I cannot answer the door, as I am a parrot well trained in English. But am locked in a cage.

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Q.Whats funny about death A.You die

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I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

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Bake until golden at 375

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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What did the hat say to the other hat? Nothing, because hats don't talk, stupid.

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What's the difference between a tomato and a rhinoceros? Neither of them can ride a bicycle.

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Knock Knock! .... Knock Knock! ... There seems to be nobody at home...

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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Womens Rights.

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Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What gas station can u make a Kwick trip at? Kwick trip

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When life hands you lemons, you should question your sanity

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What does DNA stand for? The National Dyslexic Association

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What do men and women have in common? They're both respected members of society, besides women.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A Holocaust survivor.

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Well, if the socket were 20 feet in the air, it might take 4 blondes with really good balance. Then again, it might not matter how many blondes there are due to transportation issues. (What if there are no replacement light bulbs in the house, and the nearest store was 10 miles away? It would be ridiculous to expect someone to walk twenty miles to replace a light bulb) In conclusion, I would say that the number of blondes it takes to screw in a light bulb is dependent on the individual situation at hand.

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Try saying "Good Eye Might" without sounding Australian.

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what smells worse then shit Drew White

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Knock, knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest!

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Why did the man jump off a cliff? Because he was committing suicide.

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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3 guys walk into a bar....dont you think one would see it ?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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