Roses are red Violets are blue I have Multiple Personalities So do I Me to Don't forget about me!

knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

Knock knock Who's there? Rick Rick who? Your wife's boss. I regret to inform you that your wife has sustained a injury on the job and she is in intensive care... I also regret to inform you that your insurance doesn't cover the injury

A man walks into a bar, and spends all his money because he is an alchoholic.

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A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

Whats the difference between a dead cat and a woman. The cat had a life.

How do you make a blonde stupid as hell. Give birth to it

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

What do you call a dog that's having a stroke? An emergency animal hospital.

That's a rhetorical question chickens don't cross roads!

How much is a pet whale? $1350.99

Why did Hitler kill himself? Cause he couldn't afford to pay the gas bill.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic with a family of four and is ruining his life. -Tag

what is the entire jewish population minus about 13 million? The Holocaust.

What do you call Eric Torres A furnace magnet

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

SINCE YOU ARE OBVIOUSLY READING THIS, IT WILL GET THE MOST LIKES!!!!!

What's worse then finding a repeated joke on antijokes? Finding a real joke.

What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? An alive one at the bottom eating it's way out.

Two Gay Men Walk Into a Bar, Not Just Any Bar...... a Sports Bar and Enjoy a nice cold Beer with their Heterosexual friends while watching the super bowl. They both go in the back room, where it is dark, together........ and they call for the manager to find out where the chef is so they can tie him down..... and smother him....... in questions concerning the size of his....... buffalo wings stop judging people you ass.

What do you call a black kid with dead parents? Depressed

A girl was walking home from school, she had a pizza box in her hands, her mom was waiting for her in the car to take her to T.G.I.F, and then she dropped the pizza box in the middle of the street. In a frantic attemp to get the box, she run out into the middle of the street and got hit by a semi. Her funeral is tomorrow.

Do you know what is worse than getting kicked downstairs? Getting kicked upstairs because then you could fall downstairs and break your skull.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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