Q: Why did the bird fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was stapled to the bird

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I hate when Harry Potter showers in my Potatoes....

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Not Steve Jobs

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? Jelly is made from the juice of the fruit while jam is made from the pulp of the fruit.

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There are two hippopotamus' in a pond cooling off from the hot day. One is named Nathaniel IV and the other Timothy. Timothy asks Nathaniel, "Nathaniel, what day is it today?" Nathaniel then replies," I believe it is Tuesday." Timothy is taken back then replies," How odd. I could've sworn it was Wednesday."

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SOPA gets passed and shuts down anti-joke because KFC claims the picture of the anti-joke chicken

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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On a scale of 1 to drunk how ten are you?

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

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What happens when you choke a smurf? Nothing, smurfs aren't real.

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Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

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Why did the mentally handicapped kid fail his math test? Because he didn't study.

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What did the priest say to the nun? ... I don't know, I wasn't there.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It was the chickens day off. haha its funny

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Did you hear the story about the divorcee who was concerned about ecology? Her husband had been hitting her. Good for her to get away from that kind of abuse.

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What do you call a clock with no hands? Broken.

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what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

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Penis

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Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

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Q: What is the meaning of life? A: We don't know. Dwight: FALSE. The answer to everything is 42.

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What did the German say to the Jew? I'm not quite sure; I don't speak German.

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Q

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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