Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

An atheist and a Christian are sitting next to each other on the bus, however both of them believe it inappropriate to talk religion with complete strangers so neither one finds out about the others beliefs and they never see each other again.

what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

Roses are red, violets are blue i've got a gun, pointing at you

Why didn't the blind girl say hi to anyone? Because she was blind.

What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

Two mooses were sitting in a tree, minding their own business, when suddenly a submarine came flying. "He probably lives here." The first moose said to the other.

Why shouldn't you ask Lebron James for change for a dollar? Because in the year 2013 Lebron will tear his ACL and will never able to play the game again. He then won't be able to land a job because he never finished college. After being unable to land a job, he then develops an expensive crack addiction. His house gets foreclosed, and he becomes broke. And is then a homeless broke man who does not even have 4 quarters to his name.

Thomas the Tank Engine could see Express up ahead on the tracks! His driver shut off steam and applied his brakes. Ahead of him Gordon groaned "Ohhhhh stop your train! Stop your train! His driver and fireman jumped out quickly. Thomas tried his very hardest and eventually found himself slowing down. But there wasn't enough time and Thomas smashed right into the express. Seven people were killed and Thomas himself was smashed to pieces.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because he was Pierre preasured by all you assholes Saying he already did it so now he feels like he Has to do it.

Why did the chicken cross the road Because you didn't fuking cook to -.-

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you dirty racist.

Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because it escaped from the farm.

Your Moma so fat, she would roll down a hill.

What happened to the man who dropped his soap? Nothing he picked it up and lived a happy life.

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

Shit Happens....or sometimes it doesn't! As the person is taken to the hospital with severe constipation.

What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

So this guy walks into a bar. As soon as he gets in, a drunk dude punches him in the face ! The dude was drunk enough to not know what he was doing, but still sober enough to hit the guy hard ! So the guy had a cerebral commotion and died 2 days later.

what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing, he was homeless

a person cries in the corner you go over to them and rape them

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? AIDS.

I swear to god it wasn't me! Dont swear to god its a sin !

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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