Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

roses are red violets are blue i have alzheimers roses are red

What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

Your mother is so old that her prom theme was fire

John Kerry walks into a bar. The bartender looks at him and says, "Hey, why the lost election?"

What do you do when you see a black child riding a bike? Think to yourself, "Wow" you don't see many kids riding bikes anymore because there too busy playing video games in their basement.

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

What's worse than loosing your pen? Getting raped by a pedophile.

Knock Knock Who's there? Kconk Kconk who? Kconk Ohw Oh yeah, sorry mate, didn't recognise your voice! Come on up, I've got some lagers in the fridge.

What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below!

--"Do you like impressions?" -Yeah! --"Why?" ................... --"That was Socr-ates."

A man opens his sock drawer, grabs his socks and puts them on.........He dies 5 minutes later.

So, Elvis walks into a bathroom...

Why did the elephant cross the road? The chicken was on vacation.

What sauce do chicken's hate? Bone suckin' sauce

what do you call a man who makes fun of womens rights? Single

A coach and a priest walk into a boys and girls club and kick out all the girls.

Darude - Sandstorm

Shut the cork up!

What do Molly and Sharon have in common? They both annoy me.

A man walks into a bar and orders a water. He then drinks his water and leaves. The following day he returns to the bar and again orders a water. He repeats this for many days until finally one day the bartender asks him why he comes every day to just drink water. The man replies, "Water is free. I got laid off from my job last week. Rough economy, you know." The bartender starts charging him for water, and the man becomes homeless.

Why can't Billy ride a bike? Because he's a fish

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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