What's worse then 10 babies nailed to one tree? Nailed to 10 trees

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Steven hawking walks into a bar. a.w j.p

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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A girlfriend scolds her boyfriend for "sitting on anti-joke all day." He then explains how it is impossible to sit on something that exists purely in digital form and instead noted it would be more correct to say sitting at a desk all day. She complied and saw the error of her ways.

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A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as that could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

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What did the boy who got picked on everyday do? He took the bullies advice and killed himself.

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what did the boy with no arms, no legs, and cancer get for easter AIDS

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs floating in the water? Nothing, because he would drown from his absence of limbs.

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Q: How do you get 1000 babies into a bucket? A: A blender. Q: How do you get them out? A: Tortilla chips.

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What's the difference between a catcher's mitt and Lou Ferrigno? If you seriously said "I don't know, what?" I suggest getting a medical examination by a professional psychologist.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Knock knock who's there? Screw this Screw this who? Im screwing this like ur boyfriend screwed you!

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Why did the Jew die? Because Hitler was born...

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your moms tits are so big she may have breast cancer she may have breast cancer which takes approximitely 300,000 lives per year

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

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Why didn't the restaurant serve the black man? He hadn't ordered anything.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

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whats brown and smells like shit shit

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Whats the difference between football and basketball? Absolutely everything By darragh Hamilton

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What is the difference between a duck? It can neither ride a bike.

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I saw a poor man named rich

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He wanted a car to kill him so he can get to the other side with his wife and son. In other news,I had a very nice chicken cutlet and scrambled egg dinner.

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Why doesn't business go well for pizzeria Vesuvio? Their chef has been dead since many years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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