What's black and blue and hates sex? The 8 year old in my trunk

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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So a duck walks into a drugstore and asks the clerk for lip balm. The clerk asks, "How will you be paying for that?" to which the duck replies, "Cash."

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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What happens when you mix a black guy and a chinese guy. A disfigured man

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What did the homeless man give his friends for Christmas? More AIDS.

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Knock, Knock. I have no door.

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Whats better than an anti joke? Having sex with a supermodle

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Yarn

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what did the right wing jew say after he was arrested for murder? bt we went through the holocust

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Narrator: A ghost walks into a church. It is a Jewish church during a Friday night service. Huh. That ghost looks a lost like Hitler. Oh crap, everyone run for your lives! Stranger: GHOSTBUSTERS! Narrator: what, the, heck? Ghostbuster: let's kill some ghosts! Wait a minute. Adolf, is that you? Hitler ghost: John? Ghostbuster: Adolf, Buddy! Narrator:...... Hitler ghost: Hey, John! Wanna grab a drink? Ghostbuster: sure. let's get out of here. Narrator: This joke has officially lost all meaning. I don't even know why I'm submitting it any more! And get this! I AM HALF JEWISH!

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yo mamas so fat... she's a map on call of duty

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What's black and blue and red all over? The dead woman in the dumpster.

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A blonde walks into a bar and orders a drink. The end.

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What did Aaron Pfeifer say to Zach Faller ? Yee

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So a leg, an arm and a head win the Boston marathon. And I'm sitting here masturbating, ...

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Do you know what they say? Words

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Yo mamma's so fat, she's self-concsious about her weight and is embarassed when people make fun of her weight which makes her escape to her only friend, food, which makes her even fatter, so she will never lose weight until society accepts her and is not so prejudice towards overweight people.

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Want to hear a joke? Jokes are not allowed on this site. Only anti-jokes.

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What's worse than missing your favorite TV show? 9/11.

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Q:Why did the black man shoot the white man? A:The black man happened to be extremely good at paintball.

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What's the difference between a duck?

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A duck walks into a bar, and the bartender says "what'll it be?" The bartender is then sent to a medical clinic after letting several wild animals into his bar and proceeding to feed them alcoholic drinks. He is diagnosed with schizophrenia.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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