A guy in a truck delivering furniture runs over a frog. Concerned for the frog, he pulls over and runs back to the frog and asks "Are you ok?" The frog replies "Yeah, you want to buy a cupboard?"

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Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: He was in one tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over to warn everybody in the other tower and while he was in the other tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on that park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich...not too much mayo...just the way he likes it.)

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What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

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What is green and has weels? A green bycicle.

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Holocaust jokes are not funny. My Grandpa died in the Holocaust... He fell off of the guard tower.

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Q: Why did Sally fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What do you get if you cross a Sheep with a Kangeroo. An abomination unto God.

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Johnny Manziel is the best quarterback ever (this isn't a joke only a true statement)(this is a remake of a previous joke)

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Womens rights.

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck.

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A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.????????

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What did the policeman say to the chav? Dickhead!

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There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

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what do you do if you see an asian trip on a step? help him/her up and ask if their alright.

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Why did the guy throw a clock out his window? Because he was mentally unstable and needs help.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

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What do you call a man with a cigar in his mouth. A person with bad health and dirty teeth.

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Do you know what is dead on the carpet ? Your mother

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An boy with ADHD walks into a

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Roses are red Kittens are fluffy This doesn't rhyme Cupcake

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A horse walks into a bar, the bar tender says: why the long face? Horse: I have cancer

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bob saget

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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