Why did 12 people die when they went to see The Dark Knight Rises movie premiere? Because they were shot and bled profusely resulting in quick, painful death.

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all these jokes suck ass

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Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are potentially dangerous and could cause much harm if handled without prior knowledge of how to use them.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? ..............

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Someone asked me yesterday why my friend Portier is named after a sports car... I mean, fair enough, it is a common misconception but they live in the country and her Dad drives a tractor; think it through. [L]

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Why didn't the man finish his dinner? His dinner was a wheelchair.

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What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

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why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

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Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

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why was the black woman forced to sit in the back of the bus? all the other seats were taken.

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My name is Harry.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He was hit by a bus.

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why is red the first color in the rainbow? I don't know go ask a scientist.

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What's green and has wheels? PAIN!!! I lied about the green and the wheels.

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Why aren't there alligators in a bookstore? Because alligators would pose a danger to customers.

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what's the worst part of your kid dying the clean up

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what does a man with no leg say to a woman with one eye? hello. by Mad James

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What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A black man is a human, with feelings, living cells and a loving and devoted family, while a park bench is made from wood and metal and used purely for people to sit on. In parks.

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What is a long boring story that no one will ever want to read? the life of Sarah Palin.

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What do you call a black man sitting on his porch in the middle of the night playing a guitar? A Musician.

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A girl dropped her pencil while sitting next to her bf... She glanced at his phone while he was texting a message that said "I love you"... The girl jumped up and called him every name she could think of and left the room... The message was to his mother! She didn't listen and left him... He killed himself because she left him... She killed herself because he killed himself... Moral of the story: Don't drop you pencil!

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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