I used to make jokes about taking arrows to the knee then i beat the game

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how many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb just 2 but it beats me how they got in there

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you'r mom is so fat that whenever she goes to the doctors, they are concerned about her cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.

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Yo mama's so fat that she should probably go on a diet to avoid the risk of getting a cardiovascular disese.

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A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polish man and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw you and your wife doing it. Nyah, nyah, nyah!" The Pole answers, "You are a very rude, disrespectful, and inappropriate child. Where are your parents?"

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How tall is the grass in Germany? ZIS HIGH! *put hand about an inch and half off the ground* I mow it about every ozher week

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WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

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How do you make a baby cry? You punch him him the gut and slap him multiple times.

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What did the T-rex say to the velociraptor? Dinosaurs are extinct.

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That dress looks amazing on you considering how fat you are.

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Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

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Knock Knock Whose there. Mike Mike seriously I told you to stop coming here or ill call the police But I just wanted to talk to you Ok thats it im calling the police

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Girls

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That Awkward moment when your whole family dies

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Why couldn't Jimmy drive the tractor? Because he didn't have any arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Jimmy was a Potato.

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Roses are red Violets are blue i got one question Screw You

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What do you call a black person at a 7-11? A customer.

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Son: Dad what does it mean to f***? Dad: Jimmy! don't use that kind of language.. use the word chainsaw instead. Son: Ok, well what does it mean to chainsaw? Dad: Well as you know, God created people, he started with Adam and eve and then he- Son: You keep referring to god as a he, are you suggesting that God has a penis? I guess that would explain the big bang theory... right? get it? Dad: ... Go chainsaw yourself, Jimmy.

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In Soviet Russia, it is the largest country in the world. A lot of the parts are uninhabitable though.

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A duck sits down at a bar and orders a drink. After he finishes, he gets up to leave, when the bartender says, "Excuse me, sir, but you didn't pay for your drink." The duck turned around and said, "I'm sorry, I forgot." So he paid the bartender for the drink and left him a nice tip, and left the bar in a good mood.

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Wade

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shea kisses a girl

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When Michael Jackson was making his last son, he named him Blanket... he was cold.

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knock knock!! kanye west

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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