Why does one not simply walk into Mordor? Mordor doesn't really exist and thus is physically impossible to walk into, or enter by any means really.

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good one jess !!

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why did the bird fall out of the tree? Earth's Gravitational pull

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A dog walked into the forest and saw a whale in a puddle

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If life throws you melons... ouch

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Why did the toast land butter side down. The devil visited earth that day and therefore everything that could go wrong did.

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What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

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What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

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Knock knock. Death.

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What did the Batman say to the Joker? "I am the Batman."

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Scientology.

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What does a plum and a rabbit have in common? A: they're both purple, except for the rabbit!

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son was captured by a sexual predator, and your daughter tried to run from them, and now she's under the wheels of the bus going round and round.

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Why do mexicans have so many children??? Because condoms resemble skinny balloons.

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What do you get when an elephant and a penguin have a baby? Dunno, it's seems highly improbable.

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I thought I was a bird and I could fly Gravity painfully reminded me I was only a human

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have Alzheimer's ... Roses are Red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's (continues)

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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FAP

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Whats bloody and wrinkly? Your nans fanny

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Why weren't there any black people at the book sale? Black people don't read.

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How do you know your cat is gay? Other cats have buttsex with him

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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I like pom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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