Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

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I get no respect at all. That's because I am a liar and a thief with no redeeming qualities.

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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how do you make the president cry ?? shoot his family !!

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What did the black cat say to the tabby cat?? Meow

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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a person smokes weed... and gets high

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A dog walks into a bar. the bar tender asks" what'll you have?" the dog does not reply because dogs have not yet developed the type of voice box required to speak or the learning cappacity to be taught the English language.

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Your mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvatore Dali mistook them for clocks.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To kill a hooker and get his money back.

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What does a snake and a dog have in common? They are both reptiles but except the dog.

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There's 2 cows, one says to the other "What do you think of Mad Cow Disease?" The other says, "I don't care I'm a helicopter"

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What is a black guy's favorite hobby? Stamp collecting.

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What do Elephants never forget? 9/11

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What do you get when you put white cheese in a blender and turn it on? White cheese.

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Barack Obama

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How do you murder a blonde? You drop a bull dozer on her filled with 2 bulls, 100 wasps and a rabbit squirrel.

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Q) Whats wet fishy and gets caught by fishermen? A) fish.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No? Neither has Stevie Wonder

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So a bunch of blondes are in a group and a murder comes by and sais, "if you want to live, answer a question right." so the blondes pick there smartest on. the first question is, what is 9+4... the blonde answers five, the crowd goes "give her another chance giver her another chance, same thing happens, she gets it wrong and the crowd goes "give her another chance, give her another chance." the murderer sais "ok fine this is your final guess, what is 2+2" the blonde goes "uuhhhhhh... 4?" And the whole crowd goes "give her another chance give her another chance

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what does the black guy order for a drink at the bar. kool aid

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Chuck Norris doesn't swim... He never learned

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops