Q. Why did the middle-aged man need glasses? A. The man's father had poor eyesight and therefore could not see well without the help of glasses.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a Jew in Harlem? It depends on what his name is. I advise procuring a polite introduction from a mutual acquaintance.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Little Jimmy has 100 candy bars, and he eats 95 of them. What dies little Jimmy have? Diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Where do black jews go? The back of the oven

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you stop the unstoppable You dont

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's worse than falling on concrete? Being eaten by futuristic mutant trees in a volcano

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a black man that robs a bank? A bank robber

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the colonel say to the soldier before he got into the army tank? Get in.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's bigger then a bowling ball? What? Your mom!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

a Black Swan walks into a bar......,,,.she then has hallucinations and imagines herself having lesbian sex with Mila Kunis...

thumb_up thumb_down +27

whats worse than 9/11? 9/12

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a puppy with no eyes? Ugly.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you call a black guy, a white guy, a mexican guy, and a chinese guy jumping out of a plane? Skydivers.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Not sure, its just a really rare combination, people tell me stuff like "oh they are really bright brown" like hell they are, I mean sorry but the hell they are. I prefer it the way you say it, they are red, really really red, and you do not say it as if I had something to be ashamed off.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What do you get after putting bread in a toaster? -Toast.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +27

knock knock who's there? Bill Bill who? Bill Smith, we went to high school together. Oh hey Bill, come on in.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

240

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Two men walk in to a bar, one buys a beer. The second receives a phone call and leaves.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how do you get a taco? Buy one!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops