Whats worst than the world ending? Charlie Sheen Not Winning

Your mom is so cheap, that she eats her cereal with a fork to save milk

A man is training his dog. He tells the dog to sit. The dog sits. "Good boy!" said the man. The dog did not thank the man for the compliment because dogs cannot speak.

A chicken cross's the road it dies when a car runs it over

Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

Michael Brown

Roses are grey Violets are grey I am a dog

Knock Knock And then I looked through the peephole and I saw it was the handyman that was going to fix my leaky sink so I opened the door

What did the African do when he found out he was constipated? He ate a laxative and went to the toilet

What do you call an arab flying a 747? A pilot.

whats the difference between chuck norris and a normal human being? nothing

Where did the watch-dog take the blind man on Saturday afternoon? Wherever the blind man wanted to go

What's the difference between Hitler and Kim Jong Il? Hitler's German

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because he was dead. Q: Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? A: Because he was stapled to the monkey.

What's the difference between dead babies and Christmas lights? I don't have Christmas lights hanging on my Christmas tree...

What is brown and sticky? Poop

What's black and makes me food? A microwave.

whats green and has wheels? grass i lied about the wheels

Why did the 5 year-old go to the hospital? He had cancer

How do you do you cure cancer? Very carefully.

What did the teacher say to the student? Get in the closet

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was stuck in its coop on the farm. Also, chickens aren't sentient, so they can't reason the same way we do.

Whats worse than biting into your apple and finding a worm? Biting into your dog and finding a worm.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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